Category: Business

You all know what I do, right?

It would appear that a lot of people don’t, and if I hear “I didn’t know you could help me with that” one more time I may actually burst. That would be messy and I’m sure we’d all prefer not to see the outcome.

So yes, I am a web developer – not a web designer, and never a webmaster – but these days my business card says “Internet Consultant”, because I do more than HTML now. Yes, I do still develop websites, but these days I can provide nearly every service needed to run a website in-house, including domain name registration, web hosting, SSL certificates, even dedicated servers and co-location if needed. I’m also a pretty good adviser.

None of those are just a handy sideline of my business either, I run my own servers in the CIX data centre in Cork, which I helped to found; and I manage several important domain portfolios, including one client with hundreds of domains.

So please, have a look at the Beecher Networks website if you have anything web or net-related coming up, and a nose around my LinkedIn profile for a review of what I do, and the recommendations people have given me.

Facebook Files 5bn IPO

I’d just like to state for the record that anyone that buys these shares and keeps them for more than a couple of days is a moron. Facebook can only go in one direction after the initial demand, and that’s why Giant Asshat Zuckerberg is selling now. He may be a Giant Asshat, but he’s not a stupid Giant Asshat.

http://guardian.co.uk/technology/2012/feb/01/facebook-files-5bn-ipo

(Did I mention that Zuckerberg is a Giant Asshat? Sorry about the completely obvious post, it was really just an excuse to say that. I fucking hate the guy and all he represents. Asshat.)

Justin Mason’s Nose Flute

Is there any end to that man’s talents? Between his 1337 skillz on the nose flute and his highlighting of the crap Justice Charleton parroted in his judgement on UPC v Dumb Greed Merchants, you have to wonder. Course he’s just parroting “Gambra” on thumped.com, but that’s neither here nor there!

Long story short: Yay Charleton for deciding in favour of UPC. Boo Charleton for parroting makey-uppey numbers for “piracy”. Boo Charleton for essentially suggesting that Gov.ie enact legislation to allow the labels to skip proper due process. That’s two boos to one yay, you lose Charleton.

“Your Country, Your Call, You’re Doomed”

Bock The Robber on the Your Country, Your Call idiocy. A farce from start to finish, it was obvious to me the day it was announced that we’d end up with the garbage we did. It’s Bock’s own suggestion at the end of the – entirely justifed – rubbishing I like though. It’s how I try – and sometimes fail, I’ll admit – to run my business, and I despair at the companies and people I come across that don’t.

Now, lest you accuse me of negativity, and point out that it’s easy to criticise, let me give you my positive suggestion.

It isn’t based on marketing, positioning, flim-flammery, three-card-trickery or trying to persuade the world that we’re honest when the world knows full well what a bunch of gobshites we are. Â It isn’t based on wishful thinking, it doesn’t use the sort of nonsense phrases like world-beating that for years we relied on to delude ourselves.

It’s simple. Â I suggest investing in ethics.

I suggest re-educating our entire population, from the youngest pre-schooler to the grimmest old businessman, and including the public service and politicians, explaining precisely what integrity means. Â I suggest teaching our entire population that marketing, promotion, sales, PR and international glad-handing are of no use whatsoever if the thing you’re trying to sell has no substance.

If we don’t take this seriously, we’re doomed to repeat the current economic disaster over and over again, each generation with its own Bertie Ahern, its own Seanie Fitzpatrick, its own Fingers Fingleton, and all the other assorted, integrity-free panhandlers and parasites who have soiled the reputation of this country and sold us down the Swanee for their own, ignorant, self-serving enrichment.

Forget about Eamon Ryan’s smart economy.

Let’s put all our effort into creating the Honest Economy.

Sure As Eggs Is Eggs

Spotted outside the Co-op in Midleton yesterday, drawing plenty of attention from passers-by, although no-one actually went for it. 2½ dozen trays of eggs seems a bit niche to me, but no better time to have a go I guess.

Egg Vending Machine

BP Circulating Settlement Agreements in Alabama

Wankers. Pardon my Klatchian, but these slimey fuckers do my head in. How is this kind of crap still happening, are we as a species ever going to learn from our past mistakes?

al.com: Alabama Attorney General Troy King said tonight that he has told representatives of BP Plc. that they should stop circulating settlement agreements among coastal Alabamians.

The agreements, King said, essentially require that people give up the right to sue in exchange for payment of up to $5,000.

Tim O’Reilly

From Jason Kottke:

Inc. Magazine has a nice profile of Tim O’Reilly. Tim’s business philosophy is refreshing.

O’Reilly says he sometimes wonders what would have happened if he had raised venture capital and given his company a chance to get really big. But he sounds more amused by this question than truly troubled by it. “Money is like gasoline during a road trip,” he says. “You don’t want to run out of gas on your trip, but you’re not doing a tour of gas stations. You have to pay attention to money, but it shouldn’t be about the money.”

Sounds like the opposite of an awful lot of companies these days, particularly the Web 2.0 climbers.

Dear Bank of Ireland

Update 13/05: After an extended period of phone tag, I finally closed the account having accepted a €40 refund on the erroneous charges. The balance won’t come close to covering the time and frustration I’ve expended dealing with this idiocy, but I just want shot of it. Of course BOI will learn nothing from this.

CC: Richie Boucher, CEO; Mark Cunningham, Business Banking; Tim O’Neill, Branch Network; Group Credit Operations; Douglas Branch; Customer Care

Dear Person That Wouldn’t Or Couldn’t Type Their Own Name,

With reference to the attached letter, I would like to confirm that I’ll be paying every cent of the direct debits Bank of Ireland erroneously withdrew from my account, despite clear instructions not to overdraw said account when I converted an overdraft to a term loan several years ago. Amusingly, this was at Bank of Ireland’s insistence, with numerous tiresome phone calls.

I had already made one payment before the “official” you “assigned” to continue harassing me, left a message on my answering machine. I rang him shortly afterwards to inform him of this, but his phone rang out. I tried again later but I was directed to voicemail, where I left a message with my name and phone number. He didn’t call me back. (more…)