State of the Art Irish Telecommunications Regulator that 'complies' with all EU directives (and there are stacks of them that bang on about "Functional Internet Access" aren't there lads). This device can also be deployed in Conjunction with a Fianna Fáil or PD politician for maximum effect.

• Lipservice Attachment
• Arrogant Attitude to the Consumer (the Who? aka the Wha?)
• Gimme My Company Car Now!
• Giant Fat Pensions at 50, no need to wait
• A Built In Belief that Ireland Is 'Competitive'
• State of the Art Communications Buzzword Regurgimatator
• "No Power" Features
• Hands Off Operation, especially when the Eircom catch is operated
• A Terminal Inability to recognise its own Handiwork
  

*Only available while stocks last